Visiting Churches 3 – Just Passing Through – VOTD.10.16.17
And if you greet only your own people, what are you doing more than others? Do not even pagans do that? Matthew 5:47 I’ve had many good experiences with people…
Why did I say that? (pt 4) – VOTD.07.10.17
Prayerful answers come from God-loyal people; the wicked are sewers of abusive words. Proverbs 15:28
The words we speak are a peek hole into our entire being. It’s not so much that some people are better at controlling their words than others. It’s that some people are content with God (“God-loyal”), and some aren’t… and our words show us how much we’ve allowed the Holy Spirit to transform us.
–Do we Talk Too Much?
“In the multitude of words there is no lack of transgression, ” (Proverbs 10:19).
“He who goes about as a talebearer reveals secrets, but he who is of a faithful spirit conceals a matter” (Proverbs 11:13).
“The lips of a Righteous person know the kind thing to say, but the wicked are always saying things that hurt.” (Proverbs 10:32
“The heart of the righteous studies how to answer” (Proverbs 15:28). Allow others time to answer. Beware of people who want you to give them a quick answer.
–Do We Choose Our Words Cautiously and Fairly?
When we oversimplify, generalize and lump together the righteous and unrighteous we curse them both.
“He who … condemns the righteous, … is an abomination to the Lord” (Proverbs 17:15).
–Do Our Words Abuse, Brow-beat, Amount to Humiliation or Mockery?
“With his mouth the godless man destroys his neighbor” (Proverbs 11:9). Note: I have seen Christians destroy their neighbor by their SILENCE when they could have corrected a story they KNEW to be untrue.
“But if you bite and devour one another, take heed that you not be consumed of one another” (Galatians 5:15). (more…)
Why did I say that? (pt 3) – VOTD.07.04.17
“She opens her mouth in wisdom, and the law of kindness is on her tongue” Proverbs 31:26
In the proverb describing an excellent wife, her character is summed up in what proceeds from her mouth. How do we open our mouths? With wisdom and kindness or with foolishness and unkindness?
We continue our checklist for our tongues.
–Do We Criticize People Before First Speaking with Them and Seeking Their Restoration?
“And if your brother sins against you, go, show him his fault between you and him alone ” (Matthew 18:15). Going to anyone else with our criticism before going to the person we are criticizing directly is condemned here.
“He who gives an answer before he hears, it is folly and shame to him…. The first to present his case seems right, till another comes forward and questions him” (Proverbs 18:13, 17). Believing one who criticizes without going and getting the story from the other side is condemned here.
“Debate your cause with your neighbor himself, and disclose not the secret of another, lest he who hears it correct thee and your shame will not turn away” (Proverbs 25:8-10). (more…)
Why did I say that? (pt 2) – VOTD.07.03.17
Let the words of my mouth, and the meditation of my heart, be acceptable in thy sight, O LORD, my strength, and my redeemer. Psalm 19:14
Our words reveal our hearts. We can often put up a good front in the realm of behavior, but our words will sooner or later give away exactly what is happening in our hearts. That is why we need to invite the Holy Spirit, like the psalmist did. “Create in me a clean heart, O Lord”.
We are looking briefly at some of the hundreds of verses related to our words…asking some tough questions about our hearts, as revealed by our mouths:
–Are We Always Careful to Tell the Truth When We Speak?
“A man who bears false witness against his neighbor is a maul, and a sword, and a sharp arrow” (Proverbs 25:18).
“For out of the heart come forth evil thoughts…false witness, railings: these are the things which defile the man” (Matthew 15:19-20).
“There are six things which the Almighty hates, yes seven which are an abomination to Him: … a lying tongue…a false witness who utters lies” (Proverbs 6:16-19). (more…)
Kindness: the Bottom Line – VOTD.12.13.16
You will know them by their fruits…A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, nor can a bad tree bear good fruit…Thus you will know them by their fruits. Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but only the one who does the will of my Father in heaven. Matthew 7:16-20
One of the things I hope readers walk away from this series on Kindness with is that Kindness is not so much random acts as it is a radical lifestyle.
And I must admit that when I first started to write about Christian kindness, I was concerned it might come across as touchy-feely, like a down pillow with no substance at the core. Yes, kindness has a firm center and that center is Jesus (will of my Father in heaven). But it also has soft edges.
The fact is, too often we see Christians displaying soft centers and hard edges. When Christians have hard edges, you can be sure that those edges are there to protect a soft understanding of the Christian faith, a weak relationship with Jesus…or none at all. If you read today’s verse in context, that latter conclusion is inescapable.
Yes, our actions really do display the reality at the core of our lives. By their fruits you shall know them. Good beliefs are a wonderful thing, but they never walk alone. If our good beliefs aren’t accompanied by the fruit of kindness, then our beliefs aren’t good after all. They resemble the clanging gong Paul talked about in 1 Corinthians 13.
It’s been said before, the branches of an apple tree do not try to produce apples; they produce apples because they’re attached to an apple tree. Same with Christians. We are kind because we’re attached to the right tree: Jesus. (more…)
How Wrong-identity Produces Unkindness – VOTD.12.12.16
Jesus said, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Luke 23:34
Turn your soul’s vision to Jesus, and look and look at him, and a strange dimness will come over all that is apart from Him – Lilias Trotter
People do some pretty destructive things—even self-destructive things. If we’re watching, we shake our head and wonder what ever caused such unkind behaviors. It doesn’t make any sense. This is especially mystifying when it’s Christians who are behaving so destructively.
For weeks we’ve been talking about how kind people do what they do out of the identity that is theirs in Jesus. And it’s worth mentioning that people do unkind things out of their lack of identity. People do destructive and self-destructive things, even in the church, because their identity is in a muddle, or perhaps it’s in something other than Jesus.
If Jesus went through all sorts of trauma—by the spiritual leaders of his day; His flesh ripped apart, His beard torn out, spit on, hung on a cross, and He could look upon these people and say, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do,” that’s radical forgiveness. (more…)
How Identity Produces Kindness – VOTD.12.06.16
For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. Romans 8:29
God’s purpose in creation and redemption is to have spiritual children conformed to the image of His Son. I’ve been saying for weeks that practicing kindness, for example, is greatly dependent on how we perceive ourselves (our identity). But how does that happen in us?
Our identities are essential to making us conformed to His image. When our identities are in Jesus, we’re going to live life differently than if our identities are in something else, even things like church, positions, our leaders; or other things like our political affiliation, the color of our skin, our gender, ancestry, profession, etc. What is it about how we see ourselves that makes it so important?
1. Our identity controls our vision. When our identity is in Jesus and all that He is for us and is doing in us, we see possibilities that other people cannot appreciate. While others stumble around in spiritual confusion/sluggishness, we see where we’re going (1 Jn 1:7), and have clarity of purpose because we are called according to His purpose (Rom 8:28). (more…)
Kindness, Identity in Jesus – VOTD.12.05.16
And you are complete in Him, who has all authority over all principality and power. Colossians 2:10
It may seem strange, but believers, we need to be taught who we are—that we are the righteousness of God in Jesus (2 Cor 5:21); we are walking miracles. We were dead in trespasses and sins…But God made us alive in Jesus (Eph 2:1,5). You and I may not feel like walking resurrections, but we are (Rom 6:5).
The fact that many believers do not know their identity in Jesus, and do not feel as if it were true, isn’t new and isn’t surprising. Paul prayed for believers that we “may know the immeasurable greatness of (God’s) power toward us who believe” (Eph 1:18,19). Apparently, he thought the Ephesian believers needed God to teach them the wonders of who they were. He was praying for God to show them their identity.
Christian virtues like kindness, joy, peace and power are not just gifts that Jesus bestows upon us. They are the new nature He has recreated us with when we became Christians. They are the very kindness, joy, peace and power of Jesus Himself. (more…)
Kindness, Identity and Overcompensating – VOTD.11.29.16
A woman named Martha opened her home to (Jesus). She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.” Luke 10:38-42
Last time we saw how easy it is to fall into a sense of value-less-ness when our relationship with the Lord is not founded on our true identity in Him…the truth of His unconditional love for us, and His plan for our lives. Many sit on the sidelines (or don’t come to the game at all) because they haven’t got that foundation of identity in Jesus cleared up. It’s living out of rejection.
Another way rejection works is for people who have spiritual identity issues to become the star performer…they overcompensate (and you’ve probably seen this). They’re like Martha, trying to become all things to everyone and at the end of the day they’re so exhausted from meeting everyone else’s needs—they’ve been so kind to so many—that there’s nothing left and they become weary while doing good and lose heart (Gal 6:9). (more…)
Kindness, Identity and Relationship – VOTD.11.28.16
While David was in the wilderness of Ziph at Horesh. And Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David at Horesh, and encouraged him in God. 1 Samuel 23:15,16
We’ve been looking at foundational questions in the Christian life such as “Who am I?”, “Why am I here?”, “What is God’s plan for me?”, “Does God Love me?”… The answers to these questions make up our personal identity. And without healthy answers to such questions we will have a shaky foundation for practicing Christian graces such as kindness.
A final question: “So what?” “Does anyone even care who I am, that God loves me, that He has a plan for me?” Questions like that brings us to the topic of relationships. That is, in my life, do I have relationships that affirm my value to God and His plan for my life?
In today’s verses, we see Jonathan coming to David and encouraging him in the Lord—in context he’s affirming David in who he is, why he’s here, and what God’s purpose is for David’s life. We all need relationships like that. Because when we’re bombarded with feelings of rejection it’s easy to conclude that nobody loves us, nobody cares, then the enemy has us right where he wants us: defeated. We give up. Stop trying. Throw in the towel…
Withdraw, withdraw, withdraw. And that’s the hopelessness route. It’s the battleground of no value. They feel like they have no value, period. Self-rejection and unworthiness typify their lives. And their hearts turn off and they’re numb and they isolate themselves and they’re miserable and they don’t even know why. (more…)