How Wrong-identity Produces Unkindness – VOTD.12.12.16

Jesus said, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do.” Luke 23:34 

Turn your soul’s vision to Jesus, and look and look at him, and a strange dimness will come over all that is apart from Him – Lilias Trotter

People do some pretty destructive things—even self-destructive things. If we’re watching, we shake our head and wonder what ever caused such unkind behaviors. It doesn’t make any sense. This is especially mystifying when it’s Christians who are behaving so destructively.

For weeks we’ve been talking about how kind people do what they do out of the identity that is theirs in Jesus. And it’s worth mentioning that people do unkind things out of their lack of identity. People do destructive and self-destructive things, even in the church, because their identity is in a muddle, or perhaps it’s in something other than Jesus.

If Jesus went through all sorts of trauma—by the spiritual leaders of his day; His flesh ripped apart, His beard torn out, spit on, hung on a cross, and He could look upon these people and say, “Father forgive them, for they know not what they do,” that’s radical forgiveness. (more…)

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How Identity Produces Kindness – VOTD.12.06.16

For those God foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the image of his Son, that he might be the firstborn among many brothers and sisters. Romans 8:29

God’s purpose in creation and redemption is to have spiritual children conformed to the image of His Son. I’ve been saying for weeks that practicing kindness, for example, is greatly dependent on how we perceive ourselves (our identity). But how does that happen in us?

Our identities are essential to making us conformed to His image. When our identities are in Jesus, we’re going to live life differently than if our identities are in something else, even things like church, positions, our leaders; or other things like our political affiliation, the color of our skin, our gender, ancestry, profession, etc. What is it about how we see ourselves that makes it so important?

1.  Our identity controls our vision. When our identity is in Jesus and all that He is for us and is doing in us, we see possibilities that other people cannot appreciate. While others stumble around in spiritual confusion/sluggishness, we see where we’re going (1 Jn 1:7), and have clarity of purpose because we are called according to His purpose (Rom 8:28). (more…)

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Kindness, Identity in Jesus – VOTD.12.05.16

And you are complete in Him, who has all authority over all principality and power. Colossians 2:10

It may seem strange, but believers, we need to be taught who we are—that we are the righteousness of God in Jesus (2 Cor 5:21); we are walking miracles. We were dead in trespasses and sins…But God made us alive in Jesus (Eph 2:1,5). You and I may not feel like walking resurrections, but we are (Rom 6:5).

The fact that many believers do not know their identity in Jesus, and do not feel as if it were true, isn’t new and isn’t surprising. Paul prayed for believers that we “may know the immeasurable greatness of (God’s) power toward us who believe” (Eph 1:18,19). Apparently, he thought the Ephesian believers needed God to teach them the wonders of who they were. He was praying for God to show them their identity.

Christian virtues like kindness, joy, peace and power are not just gifts that Jesus bestows upon us. They are the new nature He has recreated us with when we became Christians. They are the very kindness, joy, peace and power of Jesus Himself. (more…)

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Kindness, Identity and Overcompensating – VOTD.11.29.16

A woman named Martha opened her home to (Jesus). She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!” “Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her.”  Luke 10:38-42

Last time we saw how easy it is to fall into a sense of value-less-ness when our relationship with the Lord is not founded on our true identity in Him…the truth of His unconditional love for us, and His plan for our lives. Many sit on the sidelines (or don’t come to the game at all) because they haven’t got that foundation of identity in Jesus cleared up. It’s living out of rejection.

Another way rejection works is for people who have spiritual identity issues to become the star performer…they overcompensate (and you’ve probably seen this). They’re like Martha, trying to become all things to everyone and at the end of the day they’re so exhausted from meeting everyone else’s needs—they’ve been so kind to so many—that there’s nothing left and they become weary while doing good and lose heart (Gal 6:9). (more…)

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Kindness, Identity and Relationship – VOTD.11.28.16

While David was in the wilderness of Ziph at Horesh. And Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David at Horesh, and encouraged him in God.  1 Samuel 23:15,16

We’ve been looking at foundational questions in the Christian life such as “Who am I?”, “Why am I here?”, “What is God’s plan for me?”, “Does God Love me?”… The answers to these questions make up our personal identity. And without healthy answers to such questions we will have a shaky foundation for practicing Christian graces such as kindness.

A final question: “So what?” “Does anyone even care who I am, that God loves me, that He has a plan for me?” Questions like that brings us to the topic of relationships. That is, in my life, do I have relationships that affirm my value to God and His plan for my life?

In today’s verses, we see Jonathan coming to David and encouraging him in the Lord—in context he’s affirming David in who he is, why he’s here, and what God’s purpose is for David’s life. We all need relationships like that. Because when we’re bombarded with feelings of rejection it’s easy to conclude that nobody loves us, nobody cares, then the enemy has us right where he wants us: defeated. We give up. Stop trying. Throw in the towel…

Withdraw, withdraw, withdraw. And that’s the hopelessness route. It’s the battleground of no value. They feel like they have no value, period. Self-rejection and unworthiness typify their lives. And their hearts turn off and they’re numb and they isolate themselves and they’re miserable and they don’t even know why. (more…)

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Our Identity – Seeking God – VOTD.11.22.16

Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart. Jeremiah 29:12-13

Last time we drew our attention to Jeremiah 29:11 which says, “I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.” Today’s verses follow right on the heels of that promise. Last night I saw this meditation which I wrote 5 years ago on the same verses and it fit well with our theme of our identity and practicing kindness. So I’m reproducing it here. You see, God’s plan is active and He calls his people to actively pursue it. And Kindness is what happens when we’re pursuing our identity in Jesus.

God is telling His people: I’ve got a good plan for you (v29), here are some things you can do
1. CALL to Me. God is calling us according to His purpose, Paul writes (Rom 8:28). In keeping with the purpose and plan God has for us, He calls us. But He wants us to call out to Him. “the same Lord is Lord of all, bestowing his riches on all who call on him (Rom 10:12). Calling on God is both simple and profound. It was so central to the identity of Christians in the early Church that they were referred to as “those everywhere who call on the name of our Lord Jesus Christ” (Acts 9:14, et al., 1 Cor 1:2) (more…)

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The Identity of Kindness (pt 4) – VOTD.11.21.16

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you, and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11

Closely tied to the question we’ve been looking at related to our identity in Jesus and our practice of kindness (Who am I? Does God Love me?) is another question that makes up our identity: ‘Why am I here?’ For Christians, this comes down to God’s call on our lives. This is where His plan comes in.

It’s not uncommon for Christians at times to be obsessed with God’s plan for their lives. This is especially true when they haven’t established who they are in Jesus, or internalized the fact that God loves them immeasurably more than they can comprehend. (See parts 1, 2, & 3 of this series).

So if Christians try to determine, establish, and walk in God’s personal plan for them—without the foundation of identity and the love of God—they are more likely to fear His plan or their inability to attain it…than a faith-building confidence they find comfort in. It becomes a frustration, like finding a needle in a haystack.

And it’s come to a place where saying “God has a wonderful plan for my life,” becomes a Christian cliché rather than a truth we live from. When I meet other Christians they want my resume (they ask the questions—what positions do you hold? what roles do you play?). They are trying to discover my identity but they’re looking in the wrong place. (more…)

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The Identity of Kindness (pt 3) Who Am I? – VOTD.11.15.16

…being found in (Jesus), not having a righteousness of my own that comes from keeping a list of rules (religious characteristics), but that which comes through faith in Christ. Philippians 3:9

Last time we looked at 2 questions establishing the healthy identity that is needed for kindness to fill our lives. 1. ‘Am I loved by God?’ 2. ‘Am I loved by others’. Today we’ll look at a 3rd question ‘Who am I?’ Apart from roles I play; apart from titles people call me, apart from things I do, who am I really?

‘Who am I?’ is a question usually associated with kids in their teens trying to figure out the imponderables of life; the question is dismissed as an adolescent heart-palpitation. But our identity is important to God and it’s an area that virtually all advertisers, all employers/schools, all churches/clubs attempt to engineer and exploit. They know something we don’t: If they can define our identity, you and I will belong to them and they will control us.

What do they drive us to look for our identity in? What we wear; What we buy; Who we associate with; How we use our time (that’s a biggie); What we see in the mirror. What other people will think (as if everyone is thinking about us in the first place!).

Even as Christians who walk in the Spirit, our identity is often about religious characteristics. I travel a lot and I meet a lot of wonderful Christians. I can tell you the first questions Christians always ask: Where we go to church; what denomination/non denomination are we; What’s our political stance on a social issue (including Israel); What about school… Do you see where this is going? We identify each other by our religious characteristics instead of being in Christ. (more…)

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The Identity of Kindness (pt 2) – VOTD.11.14.16

One of the teachers of the law…asked [Jesus], “Of all the commandments, which is the most important?” Jesus answered, “The most important one is this: ‘Hear, O Israel: The Lord our God, the Lord is one. Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength.’ The second is this: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ There is no commandment greater than these.” Mark 12:28-31

There’s a popular saying that if we are to love others as we love ourselves, we have to love ourselves. That statement has been used to justify all sorts of self-indulgence, which was never the point of Jesus words in today’s verse. But it also reflects a truth that becomes more obvious when talking about showing love through acts of Kindness.

People who are at peace with themselves are able to give peace away. People who are kind to themselves are people with a reservoir of kindness to work from in their kind words and actions. People with a healthy identity spread emotional health among those they come in contact with.

So the first question in establishing a healthy identity is ‘Am I loved?’ And we have to find a yes to that. ‘Am I loved by God?’ is the central question of life, and similarly, ‘Will I allow myself to receive God’s love?’ We know we are loved by God—at least we know it in our heads. But do our hearts respond to His love? (more…)

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The Identity of Kindness – VOTD.11.08.16

For to me, to live is Christ (Phil 1:21) Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God (Gal 2:20) Your life is now hidden in God with Christ. He is your life. (Col 3:3,4)

We’ve been looking at the Christian grace of Kindness over the past few weeks, and that has been the foundation from which we’ve looked at a spirit of entitlement and now are considering a spirit of rejection. Both are obstacles to practicing kindness as a lifestyle.

Last time we saw how kindness is a weapon in the spirit realm and so it’s something the enemy wants to prevent in our lives. Nearly everyone has had their motives misunderstood when they’ve reached out in kindness, so it seems safer to not reach out. That’s an obvious problem of a rejection-spirited person. But most of the time it goes quite a bit deeper…to the core of our identity.

Through the lens of rejection, we will struggle with our own identity. The person who finds their identity in Jesus will live out of the peace of that identity because their self-value is established in Jesus… “to live is Christ”. The tragedy here is that for many in the Christian faith our identity is not found in Jesus, it’s found in a role we play. When we have a spirit of acceptance, our core identity is “I’m a child of God.” “I’m the bride of Christ”. And we live out of that identity. (more…)

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